Anders Behring Breivik

Hellbeast Anders Behring Breivik
Crime: Mass Murder

Written by Homer, previously published in PYSIH

Throughout the history of mankind, admirable deeds and tragic sacrifices have been made in the name of patriotism. We know there’s a reason why Russians call their country Mother Russia, why the 4th of July is a national holiday in the United States, and why Inter Milan and AS Roma soccer fans forget their differences for ninety minutes every time Italy is playing. For some, patriotism is a very clearly defined concept, and is symbolized by a uniform. For others, it’s more than that, and the definition stretches beyond just defending your land. But we all know homesickness when we feel it, and that sense of home, of belonging, is at the root of all patriotism, and the desire to defend what we hold close to our hearts.

However, for as long as man has existed, there have also been individuals more than willing to use patriotism as nothing more than an excuse to commit heinous acts of evil. Persons who justify their actions by waving a flag, thinking this will be enough to distract everyone from the truth – that they have just wiped their diarrhea-smeared ass with that flag, and now are trying to fling their shit all over everybody else. Anders Behring Breivik belongs to this category.

Breivik's bombingOn the 22nd of July 2011 at 15:25 a bomb went off in central Oslo, the capital city of Norway, right outside the building complex housing, among others, the Norwegian Ministry of Justice. Just minutes before, Breivik had parked the van containing the bomb as close to the Ministry as he dared, and had made his way to the getaway car he’d left in the vicinity earlier. Eight people were killed in the blast, and many more were injured. But it could have been a lot worse.

July is one of the most popular vacation-months, and because of this the ministry was not operating at its full capacity. In addition, office hours in the summer months tend to favor the “early to work, early to leave” principle, which meant that many people had already left for home. At the time there was some speculation regarding the timing, and one theory was that Breivik had been planning for a bigger death-toll, but had apparently been stuck in traffic and thus delayed, ensuring that his bomb didn’t quite get the impact he was hoping for.

Breivik's bombingNot that this derailed him in any way. He might have been a little late, but he had a plan and he was sticking to it. As the citizens of Oslo were in shock, and as the media were frantically speculating who was behind this terrorist attack (al-Quaida being one of the favorite suspects), Breivik made his way towards the island of Utoeya. This was where the major political party of Norway, Arbeiderpartiet (directly translated this means the Worker’s Party, which to American ears probably sounds like a bunch of commies, but in fact they are more akin to your Democratic Party) had its annual youth camp.

Somewhere along the way he changed into a policeman’s uniform, and at around five in the afternoon he drove up to the ferry, M/S Thorbjoern, which would take him to the island. He showed an authentic-looking police ID to the ferry master, who had heard on the radio about the bombing incident in Oslo, and who had no reason to suspect Breivik’s story that he was there to inform the youngsters about the bombing and to ensure their safety.

UtoeyaAt 17:17 he arrived on Utoeya, introduced himself as a policeman, and asked the group leaders to gather everyone in the main cafeteria on the island so that everyone could hear what he had to say. As the youths were arriving into the cafeteria, they heard the first shots, and as they looked out through the main entrance they saw what appeared to be a policeman approaching them. Once Breivik arrived at the building, he asked the youths to approach him, and when they did, he revealed his true self in a manner that beggars belief. With no hint of hesitation, and with a calm and determined expression on his face, Breivik took out his 9 mm Glock and his Ruger M14 automatic rifle and started shooting. At that range, he was hardly likely to miss, and according to eyewitness reports he at first shot indiscriminately as many as he could, and as people started running away in a total panic he calmly reloaded, even as he was telling people not to run, then slowly started to walk among the fallen, making sure they were dead. Some he prodded with his rifle, others he poked with his foot. If he was rewarded with any sign of movement, he took careful aim and shot his target in the head.

MassacreI will never forget the interview I saw on TV with one of the survivors, who was wounded in that initial shooting in the cafeteria, and who survived by pretending to be dead. What really stuck in my mind was when she described Breivik’s voice and words as she lay there on the floor. Even as he was shooting people he was shouting for those still alive, those trying to flee, to stay where they were, and not to be afraid as he was not going to hurt them. There was no malice, no hate, in his voice. He was like a robot, saying one thing but contradicting his own words through his actions.

Soon he was the only one left standing in the room, among the bodies of the dead. All in all, thirteen people lost their lives in the shooting in that cafeteria. For Breivik, this was probably a satisfactory start, if not a good one. But he didn’t panic. He knew he had plenty of time to spill even more blood, and that his victims had nowhere to go. The first casualties on Utoeya, the shots the youths in the cafeteria had heard as they were waiting for the policeman he pretended to be, had been the ferry master and the woman who’d remained behind to escort him to the cafeteria, and the only way to and from the island was effectively closed. This meant that the only way off the island was to swim, and that the police, once they were alerted, would have to find an alternative way to reach the island. In other words, he had every reason to feel confident. He was the only armed person on the island, he had two powerful allies in shock and surprise, and he would meet little or no resistance from his victims, who were completely unprepared for the evil they were about to encounter.

Inside the cafeteria he made a final inspection of the carnage, and headed outside to hunt for more enemies of the state. Those who hadn’t made it to the meeting on time, who had only heard the shots, were now approaching a scene that was not only horrifying but also extremely confusing – people were running in every direction, and even as they wondered why, they saw what they thought was a police officer emerge from the house. The scene made no sense, and not knowing what to make of it several of them froze in place.

To Breivik, this made them perfect targets, and with no hesitation he took aim and fired. Again, as people realized the truth of what was happening and began to flee, he told his victims not to be afraid, and that everything would be okay if they just surrendered. But by this time there was no-one who believed him anymore. There had been too much bloodshed for his words to have any credibility at all.

At 17:27 the police were notified about shots fired on Utoeya. At first the bombing and the shootings were treated as two separate issues. It was only later that the connection was discovered. But at the time, no-one knew what the hell was happening. Nor were the police – the real ones – convinced that there was only one shooter on Utoeya. A tactical decision was made to wait for more information as well as reinforcements before making any move. There was only one access route to the island, and the police had to assume that it would be booby-trapped. Utoeya was a political target after all, and the thought that it was nothing more than a slaughterhouse, that by giving Breivik time they played straight into his hand, didn’t enter anyone’s mind until it was far too late.

As the police were debating what to do – for which they received a fair amount of criticism later – Breivik continued his killing spree. He didn’t pick his targets in any way; he just shot at anything that moved. His objective was to kill everyone on that island, except himself, and as soon as he saw an object that resembled a human being, he fired. And he was nothing if not methodical in his madness. He had studied the island before making his attack, and he had a good idea of where people would try to hide, and where they would run.

MassacreHe followed his victims like the monster he was, taking his time, reloading when necessary, and kept up a monologue about how everything would be so much better for everyone if those who had been sentenced to die would stop hiding and simply accept their fate. This is one of the creepiest aspects of the eyewitness accounts – how Breivik, even as he was murdering people in full view of everyone else, showed no emotion and kept trying to convince those who were hiding to give up by claiming he was not going to hurt them.

Many of the victims were found on the trail that went around the island, familiarly called the path of love (it’s a bad translation, but you get the idea). Breivik made one full revolution of this pathway, before concentrating on the shoreline, where he shot at youngsters trying to swim to safety. Most of the victims were teenagers; the youngest had just turned fourteen.

Utoya MassacreFinally, at 18:25, almost an hour after they received the first emergency call, the Norwegian SWAT-team landed on Utoeya. Minutes later, when faced with opposition of the armed kind and the possibility that he might actually get hurt, Breivik immediately surrendered, knowing that as long as he kept his hands visible and didn’t make any sudden moves, his life was in no danger. He was taken into custody, and the search for survivors could begin. By that time, he had killed 69 and wounded 60 people on Utoeya, most of them teenagers.

All in all, on July 22nd 2011, Breivik murdered 77 men, women and children, and physically wounded another 158. Those are the easy numbers. What is harder to calculate is the pain inflicted on the relatives and friends of the victims. And even as the truth of what he had done began to sink in, and the fact that the terrorist responsible for this insane and dastardly atrocity was a Norwegian man acting all alone, the question of why resonated loudly not only in Norway, but all over the world.

Hellbeast BreivikBreivik himself was more than willing to provide an answer. In his mind, he was a true crusader, fighting for the future of Norway, the perfect soldier just doing his patriotic duty. In the months and years leading up to the culmination of his plans, he had taken a book from the Adolf Hitler school of self-justification and had written his very own manifesto (or, rather, collected, as many of the ideas presented within were variations on old themes), 1500 pages of hate and racism describing how his beloved country was under attack from the growing hordes of Muslims in Europe, and how he had to do something about it before it was too late. He also called the ruling political party, Arbeiderpartiet, traitors, as they – according to him – did not act in the best interest of Norway.

From the very beginning he claimed that he had done nothing wrong. He admitted to the deed, but did not accept it being described as an act of terror or as murder. He was convinced that once he had presented his reasons for doing what he did, every patriotic Norwegian would nod their heads in understanding and hail him as the hero he claimed to be, and thus conclude that he had committed no crime, only fulfilled his role as a savior of Norway. When his presentation met with resistance and he received little to no sympathy from either the courts, the media or the Norwegian people – who, among many other things, could not understand why he had murdered Norwegian citizens in his war against Muslims – he gradually changed his position and claimed that sometimes tragic sacrifices were necessary for the greater good of the nation.

Funny, but I distinctly recall reading a quote by Adolf Hitler saying something in a similar vein.

Hellbeast BreivikImmediately after he was caught, the police and prosecutor got busy collecting the evidence and building up a case. Breivik was so convinced of himself (and, as a layman, I cannot help but wonder if a perverse part of him was also proud) that he more than happily helped. On the 13th of August 2011 the police investigators returned with Breivik to the island of Utoeya for a re-creation of that fateful day when he murdered 69 teenagers and their adult minders. Completely calm, and showing no emotion what so ever, Breivik walked the investigators through the events, showing them where and how he had murdered his victims. All in all it took a little over eight hours. Not once did Breivik break down, or show any kind of remorse. I kindly ask you to think about that for a while. Then remind yourselves that the vast majority of his victims were teenagers.

On the 5th of March 2012 Breivik was formally charged with committing an act of terror and with the murder of 77 people. On the 16th of April, the trial began. Now, the trial itself was full of drama and I could write an entire book about it, but if you have read this far, you are probably thinking “when the fuck is this fucking story going to end?” so I will try to keep it short, and focus on the one thing that has stolen most of the attention – the issue regarding his sanity. By the time the trial was well underway, he had undergone two separate psychological evaluations, and the opinions were divided. The first study found him legally insane. The second one contradicted the first one by concluding that, during the time of the attacks, Breivik was legally sane. The keyword here is “legally”, and what it denotes is the question whether or not Breivik was fully aware of what he was doing when committing the murders. The dispute was important, because it determined what kind of sentence Breivik would receive.

If declared legally insane, he was looking at incarceration in an asylum for an indefinite amount of time. Theoretically, this alternative contained the risk that he might one day be set free, assuming a doctor were to change the diagnosis and declare Breivik rehabilitated, though the odds of that happening were extremely small. On the other hand, if he were to be deemed legally sane, he would receive the maximum penalty under Norwegian law and spend 21 years in prison, though this could be extended for a 5-year period if he, after serving 21 years, were still considered a danger to society. The five-year extension can be renewed indefinitely, which means that in this case, he would spend the rest of his life behind bars.

Not surprisingly, Breivik vehemently denied that he’s in any way insane. He has, through his manifesto, built up a fantasy of himself as an intellectual thinker and a crusader against the threat of Islam, and if deemed legally insane, this fantasy would crumble to pieces. For Breivik, this was unacceptable, and from the very beginning his sanity was in question, he told the court that he would appeal the verdict if he were declared legally insane. But where there’s a stick, there’s also usually a carrot. If the court were to find him legally sane, Breivik said, he would accept the verdict and go to prison without any fuss.

This case once again highlights the differences between legalese and English, and I would like to point out that “legally sane” is NOT the same as “sane”. Sane means you’re playing with a full deck, legally sane means you understand what game you’re playing. In my mind, there is no doubt Breivik was missing all the aces and kings, and most of the queens and knights as well. But to help you make up your own minds whether or not Breivik is a few steps short of a full ladder, here are a few examples of the comments given by him during the trial:

Bomb Victim“I have committed the most impressive and civilized attack in Europe since the Second World War.”

“They weren’t innocent children, they were political activists.”

“These deeds are based on kindness, not evil.”

“It was a touching video. It reminded me that my country is dying. That is why I began to cry.” – Note: the only time during the entire trial that Breivik showed any emotion was when a propaganda video, made by Breivik and featuring Breivik, was shown. Pictures of the victims in situ, of the brutality of the attack, elicited at most a tiny smile from Breivik. But when he saw himself on the screen, he began to cry. This was his explanation for it.

“I was born in a prison, and grew up in a prison. A prison where I was not allowed to express my opinions. That prison is Norway.”

“It is as wrong to call me evil as it is to accuse the military leaders of the USA of evildoing during the Second World War. They killed 300 000 innocent people to save millions. It was a good deed, not an evil one, even though it was brutal.”

“I would do it all again.”

There are many more, but I think this will suffice. If you see, in your mind’s eye, a ladder you’d gladly climb, there is nothing I can do but hope you hurt yourself before you hurt someone else.

Breivik in handcuffsThe trial was formally concluded on the 22nd of June, and on the 24th of August the verdict was in. Judge Wenche Elizabeth Arntzen, one of the five judges presiding over the case, began by saying that the judges were unanimous in their decision, before she read the ruling. Despite the prosecution’s wishes that Breivik would be declared insane, the judges ruled Breivik sane enough to be held accountable for both the bombing in Oslo and the murders on Utoeya. Upon hearing this, Breivik couldn’t hide the smile of satisfaction that revealed him as the monster he is. This meant he was going to jail, which was exactly what he wanted. And all through the reading of the verdict Breivik looked more than pleased, a self-satisfied smirk playing on his lips.

Convicted of terrorism and premeditated murder, Breivik received a sentence of “preventive detention”, a special prison term for criminals considered dangerous to society, which was set at a minimum of ten years and a maximum of twenty-one, from which the time he’s already been sitting in jail will be deducted. However, as mentioned earlier, these kinds of sentences can be extended for an indefinite period of time, as long as the inmate is considered a continued threat. But this did not seem to bother Breivik in the least. He was going to get his very own trio of cells, isolated from the rest of the inmates, with his very own gym, a TV and – most important of all, and a privilege he would have lost had he been sent to the funny farm – his very own computer with internet access.

Breivik in custodyMy first reaction was, what the fuck? And I’ll admit, I was a little disappointed that he got exactly what he wanted. Then I heard the collective sigh of relief all the way from Norway, and started to read the comments from the survivors of Utoeya, and the relatives of the victims, who were all pleased with the verdict. And you know what? I changed my mind. Had the judges listened to the prosecution and ruled Breivik legally insane, they would have been forced to go through the procedure of a whole new trial, with all that entails. But in declaring him legally sane, they ensured that this sordid tale received its final chapter, and that Breivik received a punishment that most Norwegians seem to be happy with.

More than anything, the words of one of the survivors of that horrible day, Tore Sinding Bekkedal, struck a chord with me: “I think it was a proper verdict. I have a hard time matching the diagnosis of him being insane, and especially of him suffering from paranoid schizophrenia, with what actually happened. He was completely aware of what he was doing.”

Breivik's victims
Now the survivors and the relatives of the victims can finally move on, safe in the knowledge that Breivik is locked away. But in this case I cannot help but think that it is a pity that Norway does not have the death-penalty. That would have been the surest way to ensure the elimination of one monster that will remain a thorn in every Norwegian’s side for as long as he lives.

How can I be so sure of this?

Well, the first hint that Breivik is still at war came once the verdict was read, and he was given the word. He began by once again stating that he does not consider the verdict – or the entire trial – to be legal, as he does not recognize the current administration as the rightful representatives of Norway, but that he accepts his punishment and will not appeal the verdict. Notice how he softens the blow of that comment by showing some mock humility at the end? He still thinks he did nothing wrong, and personally I am convinced he will never change his mind about this.

The second hint – and this is the clincher – came when he continued by saying he would like to end with an apology:

“I would like to apologize to all militant nationalists in Norway and in Europe for not having killed more.”

Yes, I’m happy with the verdict. But only because I have nothing but respect and admiration for the Norwegian people, who have weathered an unprecedented tragedy with bravery, dignity and a show of true patriotism, the kind you can be proud of. But did Breivik get what he deserved? No. Not even close. And because there is no punishment sufficient enough in this life, I can only hope there is a hell, and that there is a very special and fitting place reserved for him down there.

Source: Finnish newspaper Hufvudstadsbladet

Note from Cleo: Thank you Homer for your well-researched and well-written article. And may Anders Behring Breivik suffer for eternity in the deepest depths of hell.

Daily Mail article
CNN article

30 Responses to Anders Behring Breivik

  1. Homer says:

    You are most welcome, Cleo. And thank you for your help in getting it to PYSIH. Without you, my fingers would have been full of splinters from scratching my head. 😉

    And I completely agree, this is one of those cases where I truly hope there is a hell, and that its diabolical master has sent a personal invitation to Breivik. Not to mention already marked out a particularly foul corner for his future guest…

    • bengalpuss29 says:

      Great write up homer. I watched this son of a bitch being sentenced last week, 21yrs to serve a minimum of ten, that works out at just under 3 months per victim. And he was only gonna appeal if he was declared insane. And the reason for that is, if he’s found insane they can hold him indefinately, but by being declared sane, they have to let him out at the end of the 21yrs. Whatever the situation, that sentence is absolutely appalling. If that was american, we’d be talking death sentence. What a shame it wasn.t.

      • bulldoggy says:

        Well in 21 years a lot can happen. The families and friends of the victims can group together and make preparations for his ultimate release. They could buy a remote piece of property maybe with a barn and start digging out a new “home” for the monster. OK, a dungeon. They could also buy the equipment and accessories — chains, whips, etc. — to carry out the monster’s “rehabilitation”.

        I’m thinking if Breivik goes missing upon his release the police won’t look too hard for him or his kidnappers. And if preparations start soon, it’ll be easy to hide him/his corpse forever.

      • Homer says:

        Thanks, Bengalpuss29. :-)

        The prison sentence bothered me, too. 3 months per life is just ridiculously little. But fortunately they do not have to let him out after he’s served his 21 years. Unless they have a massive case of amnesia in Norway in the next two decades, the likelihood of him ever being set free is extremely small. There’s no way in hell he’ll ever change, and even less of a way any sane judge will believe him if he suddenly claims to have found Jesus (though if that happens, there will be plenty of gullible and moronic bible-thumpers willing to take him at his word), and so he will always be considered a threat to society. And as long as that is the case, his sentence can be extended indefinitely, 5 years at a time.

        And on a more positive note, there have been indications that the Norwegian authorities are considering revoking his internet rights. Personally I don’t understand why he should even have them in the first place, but apparently it’s his right according to Norwegian law. Which they are now, apparently, thinking of changing. The main problem seems to be that in order for any change in law to affect Breivik, it would have to be retro-active.

        Let’s just hope they have the balls to do it. They owe it to the victims, and the families of the victims. Because as long as Breivik is on the net, he’ll find fuel for his delusions.

      • Hamdi says:

        What bothered me was there was still so much focus about how in a roundabout way Muslims were still to blame. Maybe I was just being too sensitive, knowing that it was what motivated him to kill. One scary thing is that it shows just how intense the hatred for Muslims is throughout the world. You know there are probably many people who are thinking Muslims drove him to do it.

  2. Steve-O says:

    The bastard got off too easy, way too easy. Confined to a suite of rooms plus internet access? That’s the worst Norway can do to him? I’m afraid there’s a lot more wingnuts like him, and his punishment is no deterrent to them. Brace yourselves Norway, it’s gonna be a bumpy ride.

  3. 2cute says:

    Long read but well worth it. Breivik totally needs to die soon. Maybe he could have a “gym” accident like a barbell falling on his soft head.

  4. bengalpuss29 says:

    Do you know what bulldoggy, if i were family or friends of the victims, i’d probably want to seek revenge, and judging by the laws in oslo, they really don.t have much to lose. If he can get 21yrs for all those murders, then the relatives and friends could torture this fucker and probably get 2 weeks, wouldn’t that be great. But justice is unfair, brevik the turd, gets a pissy arse sentence, and the relatives of the victims would probably end up with doing life no parole, thats how fucked up the justice system is. That sentence that brevik has been given, is like a slap in the face to those victims and their loved one’s. This bastard was even grinning in court. I didn.t find any of those details amusing, but obviously shit stain brevik did. I’d have given him 21yrs just for the grin alone the piece of shite.

    • bulldoggy says:

      The friends and relatives wouldn’t even stand trial if they hid him/his body so well he’s never found. They could even provide alibis for each other and make it too complicated for the police to solve. I really don’t believe the police would bend over backwards to find Breivik’s remains anyway.

      I have visions of somebody grabbing the monster as he leaves prison, taking him to the remote location and having him run the gauntlet of all the family members as he’s forced into the barn and down into the dungeon. Just as the kids had no escape he’d have no escape.

      But how to make him suffer enough to atone for 77 victims?

  5. bengalpuss29 says:

    Leave it with me bulldoggy, i’ll thing of something heinous and get back to you on that one lol.

    • 2cute says:

      Ooooh, let me, let me! How about they start with chopping off the finger tips one by one with rusty knives. That’s 10. And then chop off the fingers down to the next joint. That’s another 10. And then chop the fingers off at the knuckles. So we’re up to 30. And then do the toes — another 20. So we need another 27 agonizingly painful injuries. If we do the ears, the nose, the feet and the hands we’re down to 20. The eyeballs definitely — but not until the end so he can see what’s coming. The testicles! Mustn’t forget those! And his tongue! Maybe that should be first so nobody has to listen to his bullshit.

  6. Trace says:

    Where’s the death penalty when you need it? This bastard needs to die.

  7. bengalpuss29 says:

    Homer, this trial was on the tv a lot in britain, was it the same in america? And you mean to tell me that this mass murdering bastard has got internet rights. My god nothing ceases to amaze me anymore. In my world i believe that it should be the victim’s relatives that are given the rights, but suffice to say the murderer has got them. This bastard did his nazi salute in the courtroom so now we’ll be having storm front and the kkk putting this worthless piece of crap on a Pedestal. How is that gonna make the victims families move on and try and get a little normality back in their lives, although their lives will never be the same again, the last thing they need is for the murderer of their children having his own blog, and being worshipped by arseole’s.

    • Homer says:

      I live on the same continent as you, Bengalpuss29, so I honestly have no idea how much air-time the Breivik-trial got in the US. I wouldn’t be surprised if it was about as much as in Britain, though.

      And if you look above, they’re thinking of revoking his internet-rights. If nothing else, it’s a start. One can only hope it leads to a result.

  8. bengalpuss29 says:

    2cute i thought i was the sadist on this site, but im starting to worry about you lol. Yes his tongue should be the first to go without a doubt, then the fingers definately need to go cos homer just informed me he has internet rights, so with no fingers he’ll be fucked for using a keyboard, and if there is a web cam, well then his eyes will have to go and if that doesn’t work then he should be decapitated and then minced up and fed to vultures. Or better still tie the bastard up and do to him what the iceman used to do to his victim’s, which is gag him tie him up so he can.t move, then put little cuts all over his body and place him where loads of rats are. The iceman was a mafia hit man and he did that to some of his victims, and videotaped it. So it does work. In fact we should video tape it and send a copy to each of his victims relatives, that would bring them closure.

  9. Tasera says:

    I hear that there are gangs in the country that have put bounties on Breivik’s head. So if hell freezes over and he’s released, he won’t last long.

    Odd fact: Breivik played World of Warcraft. He had three characters on three different servers, all named “Conservatism”.

  10. Trace says:

    Good writeup Homer. I hated the f*cker before and now I hate him more.

  11. awesomeblossom says:

    All those beautiful young people gone, their families devastated and the murdering monster gets a cushy, useless life? I hope Tasera’s right and there are gangs in Norway planning his demise.

  12. moodymagic says:

    Homer what a great writeup. Research was was well down. My heart does still go out to all the families and friends that suffered that cruel and gruesome day.

  13. Echo says:

    Wouldn’t it be nice to get in contact with that miserable animal and drive him mad with messages that he is found insane really but they didn’t tell him that. One of these days, when people start to forget him he will be taken to a mental prison where he belongs. I would love to torture him every day for the rest of his sad life.

    • Trace says:

      Sounds good to me, Echo, but what kind of messages would drive him berserk? Love bombing from Muslims? Or pics from icanhazcheezburger?

      • bengalpuss29 says:

        Telling him that the kkk and stormfront have buried their differences and have made friends with alQaeda and the Taliban, that might drive him crazy, its worth a shot at.

  14. 2cute says:

    Rickroll him! Constantly!

  15. Homer says:

    You know what would be a great way to drive him mad? Isolate him completely, and then drip-feed him news of his impact on Norwegian society. You know, give him manipulated newspapers to read, which report an increasingly positive view regarding Islam in Norway and an incresing dissatisfaction with Christianity. Then, over time, the guards would let their beards start to grow, because, you know, it’s the new thing.

    Then the guards’ uniforms would slowly begin to change, to better reflect the integration of Islam into Norwegian culture. They would also let Breivik understand that to show allegiance with their new brothers and sisters, the state has recommended everyone should bow to Mecca and pray at least once a day.

    Then the recommendation would become the law. And Islam would officially be declared the national religion of Norway. And a minaret would be built right outside Breivik’s cell, so that he couldn’t help but hear the muezzin’s call to prayer, five times a day. And even if he felt that someone was messing with him, he would never be able to be sure, and it would drive him nuts.

    With modern technology it shouldn’t be that hard to make sure Breivik would only see a doctored version of the truth. And thus he’d be living in the very hell he was so fucking afraid of.

    Poetic justice, if you ask me.

    • Hopeless Pedantic says:

      Oh, my sides! 😂
      Maybe make his cell less comfortable by stripping away all the IKEA furniture and moving him to a low-ceilinged room with a bare cot. Explain that in Islam the women’s quarters are always less opulent (e.g.,in mosques and hammams) and he’s a big fucking pussy.

  16. Micki says:

    Good post. I certainly love this website. Keep
    it up!

  17. THE_MAD_BOMBER says:


    • awesomeblossom says:

      I feel sorry for you MAD BOMBER dude, if you think you’re being clever or controversial. You’re just a sad, pathetic troll. You’d be better off taking up a new career like shoveling shit at the zoo. At least then you’d be useful.

    • Bengalpuss. says:

      As long as he wears a suicide vest to take care of. Al qaeda then I’m all for that.

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